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9 Questions To Help You Stop Divorce And Fix Your Marriage
You will learn how to better manage your thoughts, attitudes, perspective and actions in response to the happy life you want instead of in response to problems and challenges. To fix your marriage and prevent divorce you should take a week to answer each of the following questions.
What is the No. 1 problem in your marriage?
This question helps you quickly distinguish between symptoms and root problems. You will identify the problem that is causing the most pain. working to correct this problem will automatically resolve the symptoms associated with it and relieve more than 50% of the issues affecting the marriage.
Why did you fall in love with your partner?
This question helps remind you to say yes to him against all odds. To reconnect with the bright future you saw you need to remember the person you saw it with.
What is the purpose of your marriage?
The goal is to strengthen your marriage when expectations fail and emotions fade. The purpose of marriage is the value you will add to society. Your marriage is as important in the world as every hospital, school and court.
What issues affect marriage?
You will sort the issues into the sub-themes below and focus your energy on dealing with the first 2.
1. Matters relating to Problem 1.
2. Certain matters to you.
3. Some issues with your partner.
4. Issues that affect you both.
How is your marriage working?
In this question you describe what is working well and what needs to be fixed. Divorce occurs when the perceived negative performance outweighs the positive performance. You need to honestly look at both sides and not just focus on the problems you need to solve.
Who are the influences on your marriage and what are they like?
Many marriages fall apart because of advice from the wrong people. If your influencers are not people with strong stable marriages you need to rethink who you associate with.
What did the best years look like?
There was a formula that worked at some point in marriage. Take time to remember what life was like when you were happy.
What has changed?
In marriage, things tend to go south when there are certain circumstances. Reviewing the good years can help you understand when and where things changed and what caused them.
How do you respond to things you cannot tolerate?
How we react to situations is often more important than the situation itself. When you know how you react you can take responsibility for your actions and choose a different path. You will never fix a marriage, what you fix is the way you think and behave in a marriage.
Honestly examining and answering these questions will help you identify the many variables that make your relationship great, as well as those that cause stress and pain. Next you will focus your energy on fixing what you have the most control over. Focus less on your partner and their issues and more on you and yours.
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